When Fate Bring Us Together
by iced mint-o-chino
Summary: Ok, my friend wrote this story about me... it has wrestlers and is super funny! Jericho/OC
1. Default Chapter

When Fate Brings Us Together  
  
By: Chloe and Staley (GIVE ME CREDIT!!!I WROTEIT!!!!)  
  
  
  
Staley walked quickly down the halls of LAX airport. She had just come back from a very tiring case about the R. Kelley sex scandals. She was one of the many lawyers trying to help R. Kelley get out of the mess, but it didn't look like he had a very bright future.  
  
"Why did I let my boss talk me into doing this god damned case?" She asked herself. She wasn't looking and the heel of her Anne Klein stiletto's got caught in a crack in the floor of the hall. She tripped and fell smack on her face, her briefcase went flying across the room. Immediately, she went unconscious. That's when a medium height man, with long blonde hair and 2 title belts thrown across his shoulders ran in to check if she was ok. He picked her up and carried her to a bench and let her lie down. He kneeled down next to her and waited for her to come to. A few minutes later she began opening her eyes. She held her head in pain.  
  
"..where's the aspirin when you need it?" she asked.  
  
"Sorry, I don't exactly keep it handy." He answered. She looked over at him and then sat up trying to back away from him.  
  
"If you touch me, I'll sue!" she yelled.  
  
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Relax! You just took a really nasty fall, you should lie down and rest." He said.  
  
"What?" she asked.  
  
"Your shoe," he pointed out, "it got caught in a crack and you fell and hit your head."  
  
"MY SHOE!?" she yelled. She looked down at her brand new shoes, and the heel of one of them was broken off.  
  
"OH MY GOD! MY SHOE!" she screamed. She took off her shoe and held it up to her cheek, rubbing it continuously.  
  
"My poor, poor $300 shoe!" she cried. Once again, he picked her up and began walking down the hall of the airport.  
  
"Where are we going?" she asked groggily.  
  
"The hospital." He answered.  
  
"Why?" she asked.  
  
"Because I think you might have a concussion." He replied.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because you fell and hit your head."  
  
"Why?" she asked. He laughed and buckled her into the front passenger seat of his champagne Escalade. He began driving when she said,  
  
"Hey, I asked you a question, you better answer it!" She poked him in the cheek.  
  
"Right now, I wonder whether you have a concussion or you're drunk." He said, "What's your name?"  
  
"I'll never tell." She answered.  
  
"In any case, I'm Chris, Chris Irvine." He said. He held out his hand and she slapped it. He began cracking up as he pulled into the hospital driveway.  
  
  
  
*A FEW HOURS LATER*  
  
Chris sat by Staley's bedside as he waited for the medication to wear off. A doctor came in and removed the brace that was tightly strapped around her neck. She sat up and held her head, then glanced over to Chris who was sitting patiently by himself. She looked down at his wrist that was tightly wrapped in an ACE bandage.  
  
"Oh my god! This totally feels like the wedding planner! Did you hurt your wrist trying to save me?" she asked.  
  
"No, I sprained it trying to force a bag of M&M's out of the candy machine." He answered.  
  
"Well I still feel like J. Lo, and you can be Mathew McConaughy! Except you're not half as ugly, you don't have that whole 'white guy with a fro' going on. That reminds me of Justin Timberlake. He was a white guy with a fro. I don't like NSync, I like the backstreet boys, but more than I like the backstreet boys, I like Kid Rock, he's awesome. My favorite song by him is..."  
  
"Ok, I get it, would ya just shut up!" he yelled.  
  
"Look who's cranky!" she exclaimed.  
  
"Sorry, it's just that I liked you better when you were acting all drunk." He said.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry I don't please you." she said sarcastically.  
  
"Are you two married?" asked the doctor who was waiting patiently in the corner, working out papers.  
  
"NO!" they yelled in unison.  
  
"I don't even know her name!" he said.  
  
"I'm sorry I never introduced myself. I'm Staley Rice, from Rice and Richard Law Firm." She said, holding out her hand for a shake. He slapped her hand.  
  
"Chris Irvine, from World Wrestling Entertainment, also known as Chris Jericho, the first ever Undisputed WWE Champion of the World!" He cried out as he stood up and raised each title belt in the air.  
  
". I've heard of you." She said as she fell into deep thought, "I did a case for Mr. Vincent K. McMahon, something about a name change, had to do with the World Wildlife Fund. Big case got me a lot of cash."  
  
"Yeah, well fuck the Wildlife Fund, WWF is more important. Plus it's more popular!" he said skittishly as he shined one of his title belts with his fist.  
  
"What the hell is that ugly thing?" Staley asked, pointing to one of his belts.  
  
"It's my belt!" he answered with pride.  
  
"Oh my god, you actually wear that thing? In PUBLIC?" she asked, very, very concerned like.  
  
"Um, not around my waist. The only time I wear it around my waist is when I'm on T.V." he answered.  
  
"Oh, ok! PHEW!" she said as she lay back on the hospital bed.  
  
"Oooooook? Anyhoo, you can leave the hospital today, Ms. Rice." The doctor said, paging through the papers on his clipboard, "Luckily, this young man was there to take you here, if he hadn't, you might have ended up having to go all the way back through law school! You could have lost your memory! But you're fine now."  
  
"Ms. Rice?" Chris asked.  
  
"HOLY SHIT!? All the way back through law school?" Staley said, holding her head in panic, "Thank god you were there, Chris! How can I ever repay you?"  
  
"you don't have to..."  
  
"I know!" she said as she raised a finger in the air, "I'll take you out tonight!"  
  
"Well ya see..."  
  
"Perfect! It's a date! Here's my number!" she said as she scribbled it down on a piece of paper and handed it to him.  
  
*AN HOUR LATER*  
  
Staley stepped out of the bathroom, looking like herself again, after just finishing getting changed.  
  
"Took ya long enough to change." Chris said as he picked up her briefcase and handed it to her.  
  
"Nah, changing was fast, I spent the rest of the time putting on my make up!" she said as she walked out of the room. She shut the door and they began walking down the corridor of the hospital. Chris put one hand in his pocket and let the other hand glide against the white stucco walls.  
  
"So..." He began, "Are you um, you seeing anyone?" he asked.  
  
"Why?" she asked sternly.  
  
"I dunno, just because." He answered.  
  
"Oh, ok?" she said curiously.  
  
"It's just that...oh never mind." He finished.  
  
"Right." She began, "A person like me doesn't have time for relationships. I have so much to do 24/7. My boss never gives me time off, and I highly doubt he'll be giving me any time off even for this injury. He'll probably yell at me for missing my flight."  
  
"Harsh."  
  
*AT THE OFFICE*  
  
Chris accompanied Staley to go see her boss to beg for some time off. They walked into the reception area and asked if he was open for a small personal meeting.  
  
"He has a meeting with Marshall Mather's lawyers at 3, but he's open now, for a small meeting." Answered the receptionist.  
  
"Thank you!" Staley said and she walked off. She walked down the empty hall and knocked on his door.  
  
"Excuse me? Mr.McAndrews?" she asked as she opened the door.  
  
"Come in, come in! Please make yourself at home, and be careful, I just got updated on your injury." He replied gruffly.  
  
"Thank you, Mr. McAndrews." She said, taking a seat in front of his desk. Chris joined her at his desk and set his titles on the floor next to him out of respect.  
  
"Mr. McAndrews, because of what happened, I was wondering if..." she began.  
  
"Don't say a word. Whether you like it or not, you're going to take 3 weeks off. I know, I know. It sound's like a long time away from the office, but I need you to be 100% for the cases you're going to be prosecuting when you get back." He interrupted.  
  
"Um... are you so sure about"  
  
"Ah, ah, ah! No questions, you're out for 3 weeks, period. Now get out of here before I change my mind!" he finished.  
  
"Ok!" she said happily, "I guess I'll be seeing you in 3 weeks!" They both walked out of Mr. McAndrews.'s office.  
  
*THAT NIGHT*  
  
Chris pulled up to Staley's house in his newly waxed red drop top Ferrari spider. He stepped out and clicked a button that shut the doors and locked them automatically. He dusted himself off and straightened the collar of his black silk Chinese style Gucci suit.  
  
"Fucking monkey suit." He mumbled to himself. He walked to the front door and was about to knock, but Staley opened the door first.  
  
"You're a whole 1 minute and 23.6 seconds late! I can't believe it! I'm disgusted, I thought you, of all people would be on time!" she complained.  
  
"Well...um, ya see I was just gettin' my car waxed for you." He said as he moved out of the way for her to see.  
  
"EEEEEEEKK!!!!!!!!" she screeched, "FOR ME?!?"  
  
"Yes, of course...um for you!"  
  
"Awwwwwwwwww." She whined. She ran out to the car and hopped in.  
  
"Or it could be because I have another date with Stephanie McMahon Friday night," He said under his breath, "it's always good to be screwing the boss's daughter."  
  
Chris walked down the stone pathway and joined Staley in the car. She was sitting in solitude running her fingers over the chrome plated door panel.  
  
"You like chrome?" he asked as he pulled out into the street.  
  
"No, I like things that cost more 5 thousand dollars." She said smiling at him.  
  
"So do I, so do I." he revved up the engine of his car and sped down Hollywood Boulevard.  
  
"I can see by what you're wearing that you like things that cost more than 5 thousand dollars." He said as he looked over at her.  
  
"I can see by what you're wearing that you don't."  
  
"Excuse me! This is Gucci." He said in defense.  
  
"I'm guessing it's a hand me down." She said pointing at him.  
  
"I got it custom made." He said.  
  
"When?" she asked.  
  
"I got it made for the perfect girl." He answered with a wink. Staley turned away and blushed.  
  
"I like this guy. He's a real gentleman at times." She said quietly to herself.  
  
"Did you say something?" he asked as he pulled his car up to the front of Citrus restaurant in Hollywood.  
  
"No." she answered sweetly glancing over at him.  
  
"I swear I heard something. Oh well, here we are!" he stated as he helped her out of the car. They walked in and got seated in the V.I.P room, where Chloe and her husband Jeff Hardy were already seated. They walked by and Chris waved at them as the waiter was taking their order.  
  
"And what would you like sir?" the waiter asked.  
  
"I want that stacked blonde chick." He answered wide eyed. Chloe slapped him across the face.  
  
"You'll be sleeping on the couch, no, in the dog house tonight." She warned.  
  
"WHAT!?" he yelled as he rubbed his cheek. Chris and Staley walked over to talk to Chloe and Jeff. Chloe stared at Staley evilly.  
  
"What street did you pick up this little number?" Jeff asked.  
  
"Jeff! No" Chris began.  
  
"Hi, I'm Staley Rice from Rice and McAndrews Law Firm." Staley interrupted. She held out her hand for a shake but Jeff just sat back trying to take in what just hit him, "You must be the infamous Jeff Hardy. I've heard a lot about you. Just to clear things up, I'm not a hooker. I am the most celebrated female Lawyer in California."  
  
"See Jeff, not every woman Chris brings here is a hooker." Chloe said slapping him playfully in the arm, "Hi I'm Chloe Hardy, the soon to be ex- wife of this moron."  
  
"WHAT!?" Jeff yelled as he sat up.  
  
"I'm just kidding, baby." Chloe joked as she kissed him on the cheek.  
  
"Oh, ok." He sighed and sat back into his chair.  
  
"Well, it was great seeing the both of you, but right now we gotta go to our table before our waiter gets even more pissed at us." Chris said, pointing to the clearly annoyed waiter standing by a table set for two.  
  
Chris and Staley left Chloe and Jeff's table and took a seat at their own.  
  
"Well, what do you think of this place?" Chris asked as he pulled Staley's chair out for her.  
  
"It's new money. I don't like it. I wanna go to a club!" Staley answered as she looked around the room admiring how they had decorated it.  
  
"That's our next stop." Chris said, taking a seat in his own chair.  
  
"Oh yay!" Staley yelped, clapping her hands together. Chris just laughed at her reaction and poured them both a glass of champagne.  
  
"Here's to a great night out on the town." Chris said raising a glass.  
  
"To a great night out." Staley repeated with a smile.  
  
"You're warming up." Chris said as he set his glass down on the table.  
  
"How so?" Staley asked.  
  
"Well, when I picked you up, tonight, you were a little bitch, and in the car, you were a little bitch, but now, your like, nice, and your acting all cute little girl like, you know what I'm talking about?" he answered.  
  
"No, but that's ok. " Staley replied. Staley and Chris talked all night, about court, wrestling and everything in between. Meanwhile, at Chloe and Jeff's table, Jeff was begging Chloe to forgive him. Chris glanced over at them.  
  
"Oh man, looks like Jeff's in deep." He whispered to Staley.  
  
"I don't want to end up like that. I feel bad for Chloe. I think she should divorce him if he's just gonna run around looking at other women." Staley stated.  
  
"Yeah?" Chris asked.  
  
"Definitely. And I'd help out, that's my thing." She answered.  
  
"I dunno, you should have seen the two before they got married. They were worse than Matt and Amy." Chris said, taking a sip of his champagne.  
  
"Ha, if that's possible." Staley laughed.  
  
"Yeah, I know... wait a sec!" he exclaimed, "How do you know about Matt and Amy? And Jeff? I never talked to you about Jeff? And I wasn't involved in the case, how can you know any of us?" Staley looked down at her plate in shame. He had figured out her secret.  
  
"Hello?" He asked, waving his hand in front of her face. She placed her napkin by the side of her plate and turned so she was facing him.  
  
"All right. You got me. You figured it out. I DO watch wrestling. I'll admit, I love it, but I haven't told anyone that I watch it, not even my mother. The only people who know I watch it are my friends, who are the people who, coincidentally, watch it with me!" She explained.  
  
"Why don't you tell anyone?" He asked taking her hand that was lightly placed in her lap.  
  
"Because I'm afraid that they'll think low of me as a lawyer. You do know pro wrestling gets a bad rep?" she answered.  
  
"No one can judge how good you are at your profession by watch on T.V at night!" Chris resolved.  
  
"I know it has nothing to do with it, but some people are like that, and you have NO idea how hard it is to get to where I am in 'lawyer status.' I've worked all my life to get to where I am, and I can't afford to blow it off because I accidentally told someone I watch wrestling, and then no one will hire me because they think I'm a hick and I'll end up living on the street wearing a newspaper on my head as a rain hat and bags on my feet because I can't afford those totally cute shoes I saw in that store in New York, with the 6 inch heels and...¦"  
  
"It's all right, I won't tell anyone. Now relax, breathe, Staley, breathe." Chris said calmly. He rubbed her shoulder to try to calm her down. He looked into her eyes and leaned in to kiss her, but the Staley put 2 fingers to his lips and said,  
  
"Not on the first date, Romeo." Chris sighed and sat back into his chair. She stood up, turned and hurriedly walked into the bathroom. She stood in front of the sink and stared at herself in the mirror.  
  
"You're not falling for the cute guy who saved you. You don't have time for a relationship. You're a lawyer. You work 24/7! You are NOT falling for the cute guy who saved you!" She said repeatedly to herself.  
  
"Oh god, I'm falling for the cute guy who saved me!!!" She yelled. She covered her face with her hands, "This is not good." Just then, Chloe walked out of one of the stalls. Staley turned around in panic.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry, did I interrupt something?" Chloe asked.  
  
"NO!" Staley yelped.  
  
"You're falling for Chris! You're falling for Chris!" Chloe teased.  
  
"No!" Staley snapped, "not at all............maybe just a little?" Chloe looked at her impatiently.  
  
"All right! I'm falling for Chris!" Staley cried. She slumped forward and stared at the ground, "My life sucks ass."  
  
"Why? Because you fell for a hot blonde wrestler? Who likes you back? I wouldn't say that sucks all that much ass, Hun that sounds pretty good. Fortunate for me, I fell for the guy who loves me, but stares at every other girl that walks into the room." Chloe explained as she began washing her hands.  
  
"Really?" Staley asked.  
  
"Yeah. Jeff really does love me. He tells me and he shows me, but ugh, every time a girl walks into the room, his eyes are stuck on her ass. He is sooo great, I couldn't have married a better guy, but I wish he'd pay more attention to me. The only girls he doesn't stare at are Amy and Stephanie. He hates Stephanie with a passion, and Amy, oh he could never stare at Amy's ass. That would be like him staring at his sister, if he had one. That's just wrong." Chloe explained.  
  
"Wow that sucks." Staley said as she fell back against the wall. She looked up at the ceiling and ran her hand through her hair.  
  
"I know I should be happy, but I'm not. I'd love to be in a relationship with him, the thing is, I have no time. I work everyday, all day. I travel all the time and..."  
  
"So does he! When you wrestle you travel all over the world. You guys will have no problem keeping up with each other! I was watching you guys talk, and y'all had so much chemistry, it was unbearable, I felt like running over there and yelling 'here's the ring, go get married!" Chloe said. Staley laughed at the thought. Marriage, that was the last thing on her to do list. She thought about it a little more and began wondering if she was lying to herself. Maybe she did want to get married and have kids? Maybe she did want to live in a little cottage with a white picket fence? Maybe she did want to walk down the beach with Chris at low tide and talk about a vacation on the French Riviera? Suddenly, she felt a large wad of paper hit her in the face, bringing her back to reality.  
  
"Helloo? Anybody there?" Chloe asked as she waved her hand in Staley's face.  
  
"Sorry, I was sorta zoning out there." Staley replied.  
  
"I could tell." Chloe said.  
  
"I gotta get back to Chris!" Staley exclaimed. She began digging through her purse, fixed up her make up, and ran out.  
  
"Wait! Before you go, Chris has this little thing" Chloe began.  
  
"Can't talk, gotta get back to him!" Staley yelled and ran out of the bathroom.  
  
"...going on with Stephanie McMahon, but you don't have to listen to me!" Chloe finished, throwing her hands in the air. 


	2. chapter 2

*BACK AT THE TABLE*  
  
Staley ran out of the bathroom and joined Chris at the table. She sat patiently grinning a big fake grin.  
  
"Is there something wrong?" Chris asked as he signed the check.  
  
"NO!" She snapped.  
  
"Sorry, I didn't mean to offend you by asking whether your ok or not!?" Chris said quietly.  
  
"Uh...can we go now?" Staley asked.  
  
"Yup, let's get outa here." Chris said, standing up from his chair. They walked out and, soon enough, the valet came around in his car, smoke and dust billowing from the tailpipe. They got in the sleek red car and sped out into the dark L.A streets.  
  
"So where are we going?" Staley asked.  
  
"My favorite club down here, The Viper." He answered as he pulled up to the entrance.  
  
"This is the Viper?" Staley asked. There wasn't much there, all there was were 2 large black doors with the words "THE VIPER" written on them in purple.  
  
"Yup." Chris answered as he slid out of the car.  
  
"Are you sure?" Staley asked again.  
  
"Positive. It says so on the doors. See, "THE VIPER", it says it right there." Chris replied. He walked up to one of the 2 very large black bouncers. They talked for a bit and then the bouncer nodded, opening the door for us.  
  
"You coming?" Chris asked.  
  
"Yeah, I guess so." Staley answered. She walked up and took his elbow and they walked in together. The place was huge. It was Gigantic. I didn't look half its size from the outside. Staley just stood there in awe. There were bright colorful lights flashing everywhere, loud music blasting, a giant neon blue bar, and it was packed with people.  
  
"Are you gonna come in, or just stand at the door like a mindless zombie?" Chris asked.  
  
"Hell no! I can't go dancing in this! I'll look like an idiot!" Staley yelled.  
  
"Well, what are you going to do? Were not going back to your place so you can change." Chris yelled over the music.  
  
"Course not! Gimme a pair of scissors." Staley cried.  
  
"Sorry, I don't exactly keep em handy." Chris replied.  
  
"Ugh, I have to do everything by myself." She bent down and began ripping the bottom of her dress off.  
  
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?? HOW MUCH DID THAT DRESS COST?" Chris yelled.  
  
"Only $2,540.00. No big. Plus, I got a ton of these back home!" Staley answered as she ripped parts of her sleeves off, "There, I'm done!" Chris just sat there staring at her. She went from wearing a dress to a skirt.  
  
"How the hell do you do that shit?" Chris asked.  
  
"It's too complicated for small minded people like you." Staley answered, "Now let's go, I wanna dance!" They walked in to a large lighted dance floor that was packed with people.  
  
*A FEW HOURS LATER*  
  
Staley and Chris slowly made they're way to the bar. They were both laughing their heads off. They were falling all over each other. They both sat down at the bar and ordered their drinks. Staley was laughing so hard she almost fell off her stool.  
  
"I think I had a few too many shots." Chris muttered. They both looked at each other for a second and then began cracking up again.  
  
"A few too many, that's funny." Staley cried as she wiped away a tear.  
  
"Gimme a martini, dry, on the rocks with a twist." Chris ordered.  
  
"Gimme... gimme a shot of Sex on the Beach." Staley ordered as she dropped her head down so it was resting on the bar top. A few minutes later the bartender came back with their drinks. Staley looked up and grabbed her drink from the bartender.  
  
"Aye aye, cap'n!" She laughed as she drank her shot. She looked over at Chris and then back at the bartender and then back at Chris.  
  
"Is it just me, or does the bartender look like a giant purple monkey?" She asked Chris. They both began cracking up again. Chris tapped the bartender on the shoulder and said,  
  
"Excuse me, miss, but Planet of the Apes already came out of theatres. Sorry, but you're a little late." The bartender just growled at him and turned back around. Staley and Chris were laughing so hard, it seemed like their heads were going to explode.  
  
"Gimme one of the thingy's he's got, you know, that drinky thing." Staley ordered. She grabbed her martini and Chris and walked out to the dance floor. Half way to the middle of the dance floor, she stopped at some random guy and shoved her martini at his chest.  
  
"Hold this for me, would ya?" she said. She walked up to the DJ booth and yelled to him, "HEY! GUY WITH THE OVERSIZED EARS! Do you have Cherry Pie, by Warrant?"  
  
The DJ looked at her weird and answered, "Yeah."  
  
"Good, then play it, or I'll sue you." She said, pointing to him and twirling her finger in his face. She stumbled down the stairs, laughing with Chris close behind her. They go to the dance floor and Staley tripped on some guy's foot, falling into Chris' arms. She looked up at him, they were nose to nose. She smiled and whispered, "You got something in your teeth."  
  
He stood her up and began brushing his teeth with his finger, furiously. She grabbed the bottom of his shirt and walked him out further into the dance floor.  
  
Then, some random guy came up and asked her to dance. He grabbed Chris by the arm and moved him away from Staley.  
  
"Out of my way, little man." He growled.  
  
"Hey, you know who you remind me of?" Staley asked the large man standing in front of her.  
  
"Who?" he asked.  
  
"Albert, you know that big fat wrestler with the piercings." She replied. That's when Chris walked up.  
  
"Hey, that's funny. I've beaten Albert in a match before. I wonder how much different this will be?" Chris punched the guy square in the nose then did a baseball slide, tripping him onto the people behind him. Soon, the guy was up again and about to hit Chris, but he ducked and drop kicked him. Chris climbed onto the DJ's platform and did a lionsault to the giant man lying on the floor in pain. He walked up next to Staley and wiped a bead of sweat trickling down the side of his face away. He spit on the guy and said,  
  
"I thought not." He turned to Staley and took her hand, "Come on, we better go, before a security guard finds out." They walked out to the front and hopped into Chris' car. They drove to Staley's house, where Chris walked her to her door.  
  
"I know this is the part where I'm supposed to say I had a great time tonight. So... I had a great time tonight, Chris!" Staley said happily. Chris laughed and leaned his shoulder against the door frame trying to look "suave".  
  
"This is also the time where I get the good night kiss." He said smoothly.  
  
"Not exactly, good night, Chris." Staley replied. She kissed him on the cheek and shut the door in his face. He got up off the door frame and kicked it.  
  
"Damnit." He mumbled. He walked down to his car and jumped in. He took one last look at her house, revved up the engine of his car, and sped down her street, running over a cat in the process.  
  
  
  
*THE NEXT MORINING*  
  
Staley woke up in her king size bed with the worst hang over EVER! She held her head and kicked at the sheets on her bed. She groaned in pain as she attempted to get out of bed. She got one foot on the carpet, but then tripped forward, landing in her face, as she tried to put the other foot down.  
  
"Ow." She mumbled into the carpet. She slowly lifted herself to her feet and began dragging herself to her bathroom. She fell into the bathroom and gripped to the edge of the sink for dear life to hold herself up. She looked into the mirror and almost died. Her hair was a mess, her eyes were red, she was wearing the same clothes as last night, and she had a bruise on her forehead from falling in the airport the other day. She fell to her knees in front of the toilet and up chucked everything she had eaten in the last week. She fell back onto the cold tile floor and slapped her hand across her head. She moaned as she turned onto her side and eventually stood up. She made her way back into her bedroom and got changed into grey sweatpants and an oversized black t-shirt that had the WWE logo on it. She put her hair up and stumbled down into the kitchen to get a cup of coffee.  
  
She sat in front of the table, sipping at the giant cup of black coffee she had made for herself. She let her head hit against the table top and she stared at the light brown wood grain from about a half an inch away. Suddenly, the phone began ringing.  
  
"Damnit." She mumbled. She stood up and slowly walked to the phone. She picked up the receiver and pressed it against her ear.  
  
"Hello?" she asked.  
  
"Staley?" asked the voice on the other end. She couldn't hold herself up any longer, so she dropped to the floor and leaned against the wall.  
  
"Yeah?" she grumbled, moving her hair out of her face.  
  
"It's Chris." He said. Suddenly, everything got a little bit brighter. Her head cocked up and her eyes opened up.  
  
"Chris!" She exclaimed. She held the phone tighter and waited to hear what he had to say, "Why are you calling me so early?"  
  
"Early?" he asked.  
  
"Wait, what time is it?" She asked. She reached up and pulled down a small clock from the coffee table standing next to her. She looked at it with wide eyes.  
  
"It's 1 in the afternoon." He replied.  
  
"Holy crap! It's 1 in the afternoon!" She yelled. He laughed faintly in the background.  
  
"Yeah, it is! Is everything ok?" he asked with a hint of concern in his voice.  
  
"Right, of course, everything's fine. I'm fine. Everything's ok." She answered, taking a deep breath.  
  
"I don't think so, you sound worried." He said.  
  
"No, really I'm fine. I've never slept this late, even when I get really wasted." She said.  
  
"You got really wasted?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah, I have the worst hang over ever. Did you?" she asked.  
  
"Sorta, but I didn't get that bad. Are you gonna be ok? Should I go over there and keep you company?" he asked with even more concern, this time it was very noticeable.  
  
"It's ok, Chris, I'll be fine. Stay where you are, I'm ok." She reassured him.  
  
"All right, whatever you say. Now, the reason I called was I wanted to invite you to a WWE taping tomorrow night. You can go backstage with me and everything. Or if you'd rather be in the crowd, I got tickets for front row center? It's VIP?" He offered. Staley was speechless. Her jaw dropped.  
  
"Raw?" she asked, being those were the only words she could muster up.  
  
"Yeah, Raw." He answered. She squealed with delight.  
  
"HELL YEAH!" She yelled. Chris laughed and her response.  
  
"Soooo, you'll go?" He asked.  
  
"Of course!" she answered. He smiled. She was beaming. She couldn't believe it. She was going to be at a Raw taping! WITH CHRIS!  
  
"All right, I'll have the limo pick you up at 7. It'll be at the Staples Center. Oh, and don't worry, you can dress casual." He explained. Now there was a hint of excitement in his voice.  
  
"Ok, I guess I'll see you there!" She squeaked. She hung up the phone and jumped in the air with excitement. She couldn't believe she was going to be escorted to a Raw taping by the hot blonde wrestler, Chris Jericho, or as he is known as to her, Chris Irvine.  
  
*LATER*  
  
Staley went digging through her clothes trying to find something to wear to RAW IS WAR. She had completely forgotten about her hang over and was losing her mind trying to find ANYTHING to wear. Her closet was a wreck. Everything that was once neat and orderly inside was thrown all over her room. She sat back on her bed and blew out a breath of frustration. She tucked her hair behind her ear and looked around at all the crap strewn around her room. She reached over and picked up the phone, quickly punching the phone number. After 3 rings, someone picked up.  
  
"Paige?" Staley asked.  
  
"Yeah." She answered.  
  
"I have a fashion crisis."  
  
*20 MINUTES LATER*  
  
There was a loud knocking at Staley's door, and she rushed down to answer it. She pulled open the door to find Paige standing at her door step with a worried look on her face.  
  
"Don't worry, Staley," She said as she stepped into the house, "everything's going to be fine. Worst comes to worst, we'll go shopping and buy you a whole new wardrobe!"  
  
"O.k." she mumbled. She and Paige walked up stairs to her room. Paige took off her signature Gucci sunglasses off and looked around her room with wide eyes. She shook her head in disgust and led Staley to her bed. She made her sit down and she stood in front of her. She looked around the room one more time before saying,  
  
"We DEFFINITLEY need to go shopping." 


	3. chapter 3

*MOMENTS LATER*  
  
Staley and Paige stepped into Paige's silver viper and sped to the nearest BeBe.  
  
"So what's this big event you have to go to?" Paige asked as she turned into the parking lot.  
  
"It's a wrestling show. It's live from the Staples Center." She answered.  
  
"Ugh, wrestling. How can you stand that crap?" Paige asked.  
  
"It's not crap, you've just never given it a chance. I'm sure if you actually watched it once in a while you'd like it." Staley said as she walked into the store. Paige and Staley start running around picking out every outfit they could lay their hands on. Then they shoved Staley in the dressing room and yelled,  
  
"Put 'em on!"  
  
After two and a half hours going from store to store, they finally picked out the perfect outfit. She chose a black BEBE shirt with sliver righnstones with a light faded jean skirt, and women's Pumas street cat shoes in white and silver.  
  
THE NEXT DAY*  
  
The next day, Staley hopped out of bed and raced over to Starbucks in her silver Porsche GT2 turbo drop top, grabbed herself a latte and proceeded to the gym to work out. After working out, she ran home, showered and changed and headed over to Zoe's Saloon and Spa to get her hair and nails done. After her run through the spa, she jumped back into her car and sped off back to her house to get ready for the big show.  
  
2 and a half hour's later, the horn of the limo honked outside her window, and Staley stepped out of her house. The limo pulled up to her door step and Chris popped up from the sun roof. Staley was about to run down and join him, when Stephanie McMahon's large head appeared next to him. So instead of running down and looking like an idiot, Staley casually took her time.  
  
"You look absolutely shagadelic, baby." Chris noted, once Staley finally got into the limo.  
  
"So do you to um, baby." Staley replied, taking a seat next to him. Stephanie glared at Staley, cleared her throat, and whacked Chris in the back of the head.  
  
"What the hell was that for?'' Chris yelped, rubbing the back of his head.  
  
"You didn't introduce me to your little friend." She said, trying to sound as bitchy as possible. Staley and Stephanie exchanged glances and Chris tried to explain.  
  
"Staley, this is my friend, Steph..." Steph raised her fist and was about to hit him,  
  
"All right, this is my acquaintance" She raised her fist again.  
  
"OK! My boss's daughter, AH! It's true, Dam nit! But not what you wanted to hear, ok, she's my sister...PLEASE DON'T HURT ME! OK! OK! ALL RIGHT! SHE'S MY GIRLFRIEND, DAMNIT!"  
  
"Oh, really, wow, isn't that good to know." Staley said in response. Then, no body spoke the whole entire ride to the arena. Once there, Steph jumped out of the car and ran to her daddy to find out who was next in line for her to screw over. Chris and Staley just hung around the wrestler's entrance for a while.  
  
"Thanks for letting me know you have a girlfriend!" Staley yelled, punching him in the chest and then joining the Hardy Boyz, Lita, and Chloe in their locker room. Chris stood at the entrance, dumfounded.  
  
*IN THE HARDYZ LOCKER ROOM*  
  
"So I go and I buy these really cute clothes, see the ones I'm wearing right now, I know I love them too, and he says 'you look absolutely shagadelic, baby' and then Stephanie McMahon, being the bitch she is..." Staley stood up and flailed her arms in the air and smacked Matt in the nose, causing him to fall backwards off the bench he was sitting on. He slowly crawled back onto the bench, and held his nose in pain. Staley looked down at her hand and gasped.  
  
"One of my acrylics broken! (gasp) I'm gonna have to get these filled!" She turned and looked over at Matt who was wiggling his nose to get the circulation going.  
  
"Damnit, I think you broke my nose!" He whined.  
  
"Sorry, sweetie. Any way, back to my story. So Stephanie McMahon, being the bitch she is, just, POOF! Popped out of no where, acting like his girlfriend. I mean, the man lead me to believe I was his girlfriend, or at least that he was single and I was on my way to being his girlfriend! I'm just so pissed at him" Staley explained, sitting back down again.  
  
"I swear, you look just like that hooker I picked up last week!" Jeff exclaimed, pointing at Staley.  
  
"What the hell." Chloe said, angrily.  
  
"Um...that's not what I meant, baby. I was picking her up to bring her to the supermarket! She needed a ride! How was I supposed to know she was gonna come onto me!?" He said quickly. Staley turned and patted Chloe on the shoulder.  
  
"Remember, I'm a good divorce lawyer, too." She pointed out.  
  
"I bought orange juice." He said, hoping it would take her mind off of the whole "hooker thing". Chloe stood up and stomped out of the room, not bothering to even look at him. Amy looked around the room and then at Matt.  
  
"See, isn't it good to have a working relationship?" She asked him. He smiled and ran and jumped onto her lap, cuddling up to her like a little puppy dog.  
  
"Right, now that I've killed one marriage, I think I'm gonna call a cab, wait, on second thought, I'm gonna hang out back and see what wrestlers I can make friends with." She said as she ran her fingers through her hair and left the room.  
  
"I swear she looks like Candy!" Jeff exclaimed.  
  
"Dude, you got her name!?" Matt yelled, baffled, from Amy's lap.  
  
"And her number!" Jeff answered, very proud of himself.  
  
*OUT IN THE HALL*  
  
Staley strutted down the hall, looking for the hottest guy to get Chris back with, even though there were a lot of hott guys standing all around her. That's when she came upon Shannon Moore, the Hardy Boyz best friend.  
  
"Hey, you're that new wrestler, Shannon.'' She said, shaking his hand.  
  
"Yeah, and are you supposed to be back here? It's VIP only." He asked. Staley whipped out her VIP card.  
  
"I am VIP." She replied.  
  
"Oh, I see." He said, "So, who are you here with?"  
  
"Chris Jericho, but I ditched the bastard." She answered.  
  
"Ah, I see you've met Stephanie, then."  
  
"Yeah, and the hard way."  
  
"Ha ha, so, you're just wandering around? Well, you could always hang out with me and Shane and The Hardy Boyz."  
  
"I've already spent my time with the Hardyz, so I'm ok." She answered quickly. 'Wait, I could use this guy to get back at Chris!' She realized in her head. Shannon was about to walk away, when Staley ran after him and jumped on his back.  
  
"WAIT! I change my mind!" She yelled.  
  
"What?" He asked, turning around and taking her off his back.  
  
"One question."  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Are you single?"  
  
*AT JERICHO'S LOCKER ROOM*  
  
"I can't believe she left me for the Hardy Boyz!?" Chris yelled, slamming his fist down on the coffee table.  
  
"Relax, Chris, it's not like you guys are dating or anything. I mean, you're acting like you are. Is there something I should know? What did you guys do on that date anyways? Chris, are you cheating on me? I can't believe you're cheating on me! How could you do this!? I thought you loved me?" Steph lectured.  
  
"I'M NOT CHEATING ON YOU!" Chris yelled. Steph crossed her arms and glared at him.  
  
"I don't think this relationship is working out, Christian."  
  
"My name's not Christian."  
  
"Yes it is."  
  
"No it's not."  
  
"YES IT IS, CHRISTIAN!"  
  
"No, actually, my first name is Christopher."  
  
"All right, I don't think this relationship is working out, Christopher."  
  
"Actually, I prefer Chris."  
  
"MAKE UP YOUR MIND, DAMNIT!" She yelled, "you know what, forget about it. I'm leaving." And she stormed out of the room, making sure to break the hinges off the door on her way. Chris ran after her, only to find Staley and Shannon Moore strolling down the hall, hand in hand.  
  
"What the fuck is this?" He asked pointing at them.  
  
"What you missed out on." She replied, walking right by and waving a finger behind her. Chris turned around and kicked the door frame.  
  
"Ah, fuck damn, that hurt more than I thought." He said picking up his foot and kissing his toes.  
  
*NEXT WEEK ON RAW*  
  
After one date with Shannon, Staley joined him the next week on Raw, VIP. They sat backstage and made small talk while they waited for the show to start. Staley was facing the parking garage when she saw Chris' car pull in and park right in front of them. She looked over at him briefly then back at Shannon. She grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and kissed him, making sure Chris saw. Once he was out of sight, she turned to him and said,  
  
"Um, sorry Shannon, but sparks didn't fly."  
  
"Yeah, it wasn't exactly the fourth of July for me either." He replied.  
  
"I don't think this is gonna work out. But call me, we'll do lunch. Have your people call my people." She said and they parted ways, not even saying good bye.  
  
*MEANWHILE*  
  
Chris was walking down the hall, looking for Stephanie. He found her standing by Vince's office. He walked up to her and spun her around so she was facing him. Her cheeks were stained from crying and her eyes were raw and red. She looked at him and started crying again. He hugged her and let her cry onto his shoulder.  
  
Staley came bolting down the hall after Chris. Since he and Stephanie weren't "an  
  
Item" anymore, she wanted him back. But when she found him, he wasn't exactly in the position to talk. He was making out with Steph.  
  
"I see you guys got back together." She said, interrupting them. Chris looked over at her.  
  
"I see you and Shannon broke up." He shot back at her. She was about to say some smart ass remark, but stopped herself, and instead asked Chris for a moment to talk by themselves. So they went back to Chris' locker room.  
  
"So what's on your mind? Come to yell me? Or maybe try to make me jealous again?" He asked, once they got inside.  
  
"No, I came to apologize." She answered.  
  
"Apologize?" He asked in disbelief.  
  
"Yeah, apologize. And you better savor this moment for all it's worth cuz it aint gonna happen to often." She said sternly.  
  
"Hey! You said you WERENT gonna yell at me!" He yelled.  
  
"I'm not the one doing the yelling right now, am I?" She asked.  
  
"All right, all right! Now make your apology so I can get back to my woman."  
  
Staley looked at him in horror.  
  
"I'M OFFENDED!" She screeched. Chris didn't do anything and instead, he did nothing.  
  
"Hurry up, you're wastin my time!"  
  
"OK THEN! I'm sorry Chris for poking into your personal life and being bitchy and trying to make you jealous and, wow, I'm really like dissing myself. Whatever, I'm sorry, now you gotta break up with Steph so we can elope."  
  
"Um...no, but you're forgiven." Chris said and left.  
  
"DAMN YOUS!!!!" 


	4. chapter 4

*THAT EVENING*  
  
Chris threw a big drunken college-even-though-he's-not-in-college party. Staley walked up to the front door where people where filing in. She smiled and went to Chris who was ushering people in.  
  
"Oh my gawd! Is there like a party happening here?" She asked.  
  
"No." He replied, looking around nervously and trying to block the door.  
  
"Oh my gawd! Am I like invited??"  
  
"Ugh, I guess you are now"  
  
"YAY!" She ripped off her clothes revealing her kickin club outfit. Chris stared at her and shook his head.  
  
"Always remember this, Staley. WWJD, what would Jesus do." Chris said.  
  
"You always remember this, Chris, F-O-I-L, foil, first, outside, inside, last."  
  
"What?" Chris asked, "Sorry, I don't understand, I'm Canadian."  
  
"Eighth grade malgebra, Chris, eighth grade malgebra." She said, walking inside.  
  
"Silly Canadians."  
  
Suddenly, Staley broke out into song.  
  
"BLAME CANADA!!! BLAME CANADA!!!!" But she stopped. She turned back to Chris and said.  
  
"Acctually, a lot of great people came from Canada. Like you, Tom Green, Avril Lavigne." Then Chole the author, Chloe Hardy's alter ego, and estranged punk, ran into the party with a shot gun screamin,  
  
"STOP THE POSING! FEEL THE LOVE, END THE HATE! ANARCHY RUUUUUUULES!!!"  
  
"Um, sure." Chris mumbled. Then Amanda and Jamie Barkin popped out of the audience and said,  
  
"I'm not a poser, all of you are! HAHA! Now let's go pretend to be ghetto, dance to *Nsync, and shop at Hot Topic!" Chole took her shot gun and beat them senselessly with it until...they were beaten senselessly. Then she left.  
  
"All right then, let's partay!" Chris yelled. Staley slapped him because he said "partay". Then Paige and Matt Damon walked in, and they got booed out, because n0 one liked the, and Matt Damon is gay. Then Ben Affleck popped out of no where and said,  
  
"STOP THE GAYNESS!!!" Then Shane West said,  
  
"Dude, you are gay."  
  
"Dude, your, like, so right." And they ran to the back of the house together, not to be seen the rest of the night. Chris walked up to Staley.  
  
"Do gay guys really say, 'Hey girl!'." Then Matt Damon saw her from across the room and yelled,  
  
"HEY GIRL!"  
  
"I guess that answers my question. How do you know him?" Chris queried.  
  
"I'm his lawyer for all his divorces from Hollywood women."  
  
"Oh. Why does he get divorced so much?"  
  
"Take a gander, Chris." Staley said forcefully. Chris stopped to ponder and Staley left.  
  
  
  
MUCH LATER  
  
Staley and Chris sat across from each other with a crowd gathered around them. There were empty Tequila bottles scattered everywhere and two shot glasses sitting in the center of the table.  
  
"All right, it's down to this," Staley warned, "Winner gives the loser a lap dance, loser gets 100 bucks."  
  
They poured the next shot of Tequila and Chris looked Staley in the eye.  
  
"Last one. First person to puke loses." Chris grinned and lifted his glass up. Staley lifted hers in response to his.  
  
"Bottoms up!" Staley said cheerfully. Chloe counted down.  
  
"One, two, FIVE!" And Staley and Jericho gulped down their tequila in one gulp. Staley smiled and dropped her empty glass on the table. Jericho tried to smile but instead he puked. Staley jumped onto the table top and celebrated. Jericho sat back in his chair and wiped his face with his shirt.  
  
"Ok, time for my lap dance." He grunted.  
  
"Does anybody in this crack house have a mint for Jericho?" Staley asked the people.  
  
"Call me mister Jericho." Chris said.  
  
"Ok, does anybody in crack house have a mint for Mister Jericho?" There was a long pause, "All right then, I'm gonna get my hundred bucks while you get a mint."  
  
Staley hopped off the table and stumbled over to a group of people standing randomly in the crowd. She fell forward and slapped her hand on Stephanie's shoulder.  
  
"Hey, Steph, do you have a hundred dollars for me?" She asked.  
  
"Why do you want a hundred dollars?" Stephanie asked. Staley reached over and picked Steph's wallet out of her pocket.  
  
"So I can give Chris a lap dance! Shhh! Don't tell Stephanie!" Staley replied. She began walking away but turned around and ran back to Stephanie, pointing her finger in her face.  
  
"WAIT! YOU ARE STEPHANIE!!!!" She yelped and ran off giddishly with Stephanie's wallet in hand. 


End file.
